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09-Nov-2020 08:49

But some have 30 positive references and seem like good guys.

Should I accept requests from people that I haven't initiated contact with at all?

I am a woman and a very experienced hostess (as well as surfer) and one of the 'old guard' who are still around because I really enjoy the human connections that Couch Surfing brings into my life. But seriously, who wants to even have to ask that question?

Every so often, I experience a hosting lull and miss having the energy in the house that a passing surfer brings. My most recent surfer that I got this way went on to be invited by open request to a future host further along the trip (let's call this host Jake for the sake of ease of telling the story) and texted me when Jake had plied my former surfer with a lot of alcohol and was pushing further alcohol while asking questions like, "Have you ever performed a blowjob? Here, drink some more."At least this former surfer of mine knew that I was a safe person and even in the depths of alcohol induced poor reasoning knew something wasn't right and followed my advice and stayed safe for the night. OP (/u/jedentag16), please don't be like my former surfer! Genuine hosts like me are wayyyyyyyyyyyy too few and far between.

If you want your host to not make a move you could just mention how you have a boyfriend when you first meet him(even if you don't). I did get a request today and the guy had a bunch of really positive reviews, but as I looked closer I realized they were all from females that were around my age.

I then looked at his "Home" tab and realized he has his guests sleep in his bed with him.

It's long, but I encourage you to read just the first three paragraphs.

I have only very rarely as a host reached out to those who "put themselves out there".

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For example: If someone reaches out to you and they sound cool and you are going to be in town for 4 days, have a you-initiated host for the first 2 days and invite them-initiated host to meet up with you for coffee during those initial two days, so you get a sense of what is up. I've never had female friends or had long relationships but I wanted to see what makes women tick. I was kind of afraid of initiating something and getting a negative reference.From the moment they announced this, it was pretty obvious what was going to happen, and you're seeing it.